Aw, Rats!

I make mistakes everyday. I'd like to think I learn from them, but the part I don't get about this learning-from-your-mistakes thing is why am I not wiser or smarter?  With the number of missteps I've taken in my life I should be one of the wisest people I know.  Maybe I haven't blundered enough.  Is there a magic number of boo-boos that we're supposed to make before we've learned how to live?  Sheesh.

I think the weather has made a mistake, too.  We had a significant snowfall in my part of the world last night.  Waking up to a shroud of white covering the ground did not lift my spirits.  I suppose it's a pretty enough scene for mid February, but it's April goddammit!
From my study window I can see the little clutch of sparrows that gather around the feeder every morning waiting for breakfast.  But alas and alack I finished a feedbag yesterday and won't be refilling the feeder for a while.  There's a rat who visits our backyard to eat seeds that have fallen on the ground.  Its nest is under the neighbours' porch, adjacent to the feeder. 
So now I have to watch the poor birdies wondering where breakfast is, and the current snow cover won't help them find food elsewhere.  I feel like a heel.  But the rat has to go, and I can't say anything to the neighbours until I've stopped supplying food for it.  I'm assuming they don't like their resident rodent any more than I do. 

Until this past year I'd never encountered any rats at all.  So I knew something was up when I started seeing them in unexpected places last summer.  Then they turned up with alarming frequency on what was supposed to be a dream trip to Bali last fall. But this last  one's way too close to home.
The appearance of rats in my life is a deep message.  Although I figured out what the message meant while I was in Bali last year, it seems I still haven't really learned Rat's lesson well enough.  So now I must sacrifice the pleasure of sweet birds in my backyard to eradicate a nasty, urban pest.
Symbolically, Rat means survival and resourcefulness, as well as the negative aspects of the erosion of foundations, sustenance, and livelihood.  I've experienced both sides of Rat's dual nature lately.  My aging body, my bank account, and most of all my uncertain future concern me a lot these days.  I've received Rat's message loud and clear.
I guess I've still got some work to do, not the least of which is getting rid of the rat next door.  When that happens, I'll take it as a good sign.  And that's no mistake.
- G.P.