Thursday, September 23, 2010

All the Stars in Heaven

Musing and gazing on the heavenly bodies of the night sky inspires me. It was never more evident than this past autumnal equinox. This year the harvest moon and the first day of fall happened at the same time. Oh for joy for joy. And if that weren't enough to gladden this nature-worshipper's heart, it also coincided with Jupiter being in conjunction with the full moon. Any one of these events would give me reason to celebrate, but all three at once set me to thinking about what it all portends. I'm pleased to report that it bodes good things.
The full moon occurring on the first day of fall signifies abundance and a plentiful harvest. That's a no-brainer. Even magically-challenged people can figure that one out, if they bothered or cared to do so. But adding Jupiter into the mix makes me even more optimistic about what's in store for the next three months or so. Jupiter signifies success, money, expansion and power. I know many other people looked at the same moon and planet that I did, but far fewer people would have translated that scene into a sign or portent. Attaching significance to this uncommon astronomical event makes it a lot more interesting for me, although goddess knows, even if I weren't a magical thinker, I'd have been rapt anyway.
Ancient peoples didn't have our current scientific expertise, of course, but they were quite savvy when it came to following and charting the movements of the heavenly bodies. They also tried to understand creation by ascribing myth and legend to what they saw. Well, I'm still doing that, despite my elementary schooling in astronomy. I admit that I may be completely wrong about how things will transpire for me in the next little while, and then I'll feel foolish and blame magical thinking and superstitious bilge for failed expectations, but it won't diminish the time I spent in awe of a wondrous sight. Besides, by the time I realize that my interpretation of yet another sign was bogus, I'll have regarded many more natural phenomena with the same enthusiasm and metaphysical bias, and not care about past failures.
There are so many things out there that stir my imagination. When they happen in clusters or in synchrony, I can't help noticing and wonder why? There are books, websites and videos aplenty to explain how these things happen, but answering why is a different subject. It's philosophy, religion and cosmology, not hard science. So I leave the science, the how of it all, to the experts, and try to keep apace with current discoveries and knowledge in my own science 101 style. But it's the unanswered questions, the why of it all, that sets my imagination on fire.
So far nothing in my nascent understanding of the Universe has been proven to be wrong. And my beliefs hurt no one, except maybe me in a minor, this-disappointment-will-be-soon-forgotten kind of way. When something I believe is proven to be bunk, I change my mind and learn more about the subject. (Although I honestly can't think of any belief I've held that runs counter to verifiable information - like a flat earth or the sun being the centre of the solar system. But if something I thought were proven to be false, I'm sure I'd change my mind. I still don't understand how Christian fundamentalists deny evolution. Aargh! But that's another blurb for another day...)
The wonders of creation are infinite - at least relative to what we know for sure - and will no doubt continue to send my thoughts to places that inspire and impassion me, places that are full of unanswered questions and things we have yet to discover. My personal answers to some of those questions aren't always rational; they're mostly intuitive. My intuition has served me well in solving personal problems, so I don't see any reason to completely dismiss it when it comes to the bigger picture - the biggest picture of all, in fact. All it takes for me to travel to uncharted territory - even if it's only in my imagination - is to witness an infinitesimally small, but stunning part of this magnificent and infinite Universe.
Blessed be.
- G.P.

Sunday, September 12, 2010

The Butterfly Effect

Swarms of magnificent monarch butterflies gather every September in my part of the world before they migrate southward to Mexico. If you know where to look, you can see hundreds of them gathering and feeding before they fly, in great swarms, across the narrowest part of Lake Ontario to begin the migration.
I have the good fortune to live in a house with a colourful garden. Monarchs have been visiting my home a great deal these days, and I've been watching them. My friend Barbara and I spent a sunny afternoon in the garden this past week and watched dozens of monarchs flit and float among the flowers. We sat silently for several minutes at a time just watching these beautiful creatures prepare themselves for a long, arduous journey to their winter habitat.
The summer is almost over (heavy sigh), and I've not really done anything or been anywhere, but it's still been one of the best summers ever. I've spent most of my time writing, going to yoga classes and playing with my friends. If someone asks me how my summer's been, I don't have a riveting story to tell. Mostly, I don't care. I say "mostly" because I'm still living a smaller and less adventurous life than I've always imagined for myself. This can be difficult when I'm listening to people go on and on about where they've been, what they've done and who they've met. It's not just upsetting for me, it can also be oh-so-boring. But when I find myself bored, as opposed to the less desirable feelings of bitter and unhappy, I know I'm feeling stronger and more secure about myself. It means I'm not comparing myself to other people as much, which is one of the things that causes me unnecessary sorrow.
Thank goddess for monarch butterflies. My quiet, contemplative afternoon with a friend and flutters of butterflies in my own backyard was a reminder that I can be completely at peace with myself and who I am - as long as I'm grateful and enjoy what I have, which is plenty. Unfortunately, this fine state of affairs can also make me feel superior, especially when I'm with boring people. And there it is again - more of that odious comparison to other people which is deeply distressing to me. At least I'm aware of it and working on fixing it.
This past week I spent some time with a woman who can't carry on a conversation without dropping names of people, places and things. I know her quite well and believe she does this as a way to bolster her ego and impress others. I'm pleased to say I'm not impressed, nor am I drawn into feeling envious. It's nice to be just plain bored and not bitter. I must be making progress.
My biggest problem with my yappy friend is to keep my cool and not say something rude or unkind when I have to listen to her run on for minutes at a time. She actually makes me choose to not listen, and drift off into my own thoughts whilst looking as if I'm paying attention. That can be a problem for me because I consider listening one of the most important things I can do for my spiritual development. However, the other personal attribute I'm cultivating is patience, and my time with Ms. Yappity-Yap required all the patience I could muster. When our visit was over, she was happy, and so was I. She got to talk about herself, and I got to listen - or at least look as if I were -as well as practise being patient and polite.
My time with Ms. Yappity-Yap was made easier for me because of the monarch butterflies that visit me these days. When Ms. Y.Y dropped another name or mentioned another place she'd been and how many times she's been there, I just thought about my monarchs. And indeed they are my monarchs. The thought of their beauty gracing the back garden where I live soothes and pacifies me. Thinking about them when I should have been listening to her helped me feel better about myself. Somehow I was able to feel just as happy with the monarch butterflies in my head as she was listing her privileges and accomplishments. Although Ms. Yappity-Yap's outer life is by far "richer" than mine, my time with her gave me an opportunity to tap into the inner riches of my own life.
Day-to-day life is mostly minutiae. Most of us aren't living big adventures all the time. But it doesn't mean we can't live a full and meaningful life, because there is beauty and wonder everywhere. Ordinary miracles surround us everyday. If I find myself in a situation that seems devoid of these things, I can call them up from within me. Being able to see and appreciate them allows me to heal, and rid myself of petty concerns. That's why I'm grateful for monarch butterflies. Long may they migrate.
-G.P.